The Best Worst Days Ever

Life is funny. Kids want to grow up faster than ever, and adults dream of bygone days when life was simple, when they were five or six, or maybe ten years old. As a mother of six children, well…now, mostly young adults, I spend too much time at the grocery store. Frequently, I see parents struggling with their kids, dropping groceries, and they look utterly exhausted. Last week, I saw a young mother pulling a grape lollipop out of her daughter’s hair. Yes, the child was screaming and kicking. Ah, the joys of motherhood!

You may think I’m crazy, but I’d give just about anything to get those long, sleepless—wonderful days back. I had five kids in seven years, and then seven years later had my sixth child. Yes! I was busy. They say there’s no use crying over spilled milk, but have you ever dropped a gallon of milk? I have, more than once, and it is one of the worst messes I’ve ever seen. Milk is not content to simply puddle around your feet. Oh, no. It must splash all over the refrigerator shelves, before it seeps under the refrigerator, and of course, this is while dinner is cooking. That means the dinner rolls are long forgotten until the smell of crispiness attacks your nose. Fun times…

Although the day I dropped a gallon of paint from atop a ladder on the second floor, only to watch it bounce and thrash down the steps to the foyer was truly horrendous! The paint exploded from the can to make huge spirals all over the wall I just painted. Those spirals, being a flat paint, dried super fast and had to be sanded off. The walls, carpet, foyer tiles, and me were a disaster, and I did this one to myself. Uh-huh…that was a bad day.

Oh, it gets better. My little darlings, all creative little sprites…loved to make me “things.” One morning, I awoke to find a cheese design on my wall. Actually, it was quite pretty, but cheese sticks…and when removed, leaves an oily mark. Nothing on earth would wash away the oil, so the oily remains had to be cut out, repaired, and painted. Try to imagine what they did with eggs and blue paint.

My youngest daughter, Brenna, still laughs until her eyes water, when my family recounts how she distributed an entire bottle of maple syrup all over our downstairs. I believe she was around four years old and did this in the middle of the night when I was in a coma. That morning, I stepped into a gooey puddle as my foot hit the foyer, and it was downhill from there. She managed to dribble that syrup all over the couches, floors, TV, her toys, and anywhere else she could find. Brenna was kind enough to make sure the silverware drawer was adequately doused as well.

Can I top that? Yep, I’m afraid so. Max the ferret probably made for one of the most memorable days my family has had…so far. Occasionally, the kids would let him run around the house. Unfortunately, Max loved to hide. After a few hours of looking for him, my daughter discovered he’d gotten stuck in my husband’s favorite stereo speakers. Let’s just say, hubby was not happy. The speaker died, Max lived. Yikes! What a day from you know where.

Those were the days, though. Every night, I tucked my kids in bed and knew they were safe and sound. I heard them giggling and telling each other goodnight. A child’s laugher is precious, isn’t it? So if parenting brings you any days like my past episodes…smile. Milk can be sopped up, walls can be repaired (many times), and ferrets can survive stereo speakers. Although, I’d suggest keeping cheese out of reach! The worst days become the best memories never to be relived, but wished for always.

Feel free to share your childhood antics, or family mishaps, and bring a bit of laughter to someone.

Thanks for visiting the Noracast!